Love in hurtful places


I read a lot of stuff over the internet, about Love and relationships, about what the chemistry between a man and a woman should be like, and a host of other topics. In all the material I have read, and all the “messages” I have been exposed to (especially the ones by Nigerian authors), I have noticed that everyone hides from the truth. A vast majority of writers who “specialize” in matters of the heart tend to completely remove themselves from the “situation” they explore. There is a sense of detachment on the part of most authors that makes one who might really be in need doubt their analysis and recommendations.
I have always been one to write from my heart, and there is no doubt in my mind that most people who fall in love are afraid of what they feel, especially when those they feel such for do not reciprocate these feelings. Most ladies feel it is “dignifying” to live in denial and they often grow old alone and sad. No one wants to be seen as “begging” for the love of another, and some even ridicule others who feel such things.

I have come to realize that when it comes to Love, there should be no shame. If you feel something for someone, tell them. Your silence would not speak to the person, your words will. Even as a lady, it is not a big deal to tell a man how you feel about him. Do not pay attention to those friends who say “You are a lady, he should make the first move”, or “He would take you for granted, let him notice you first”, because these friends of yours do worse things in private.

I have personally thought that a broken relationship means the end of my “time” knowing a person. I am one of the few people who are very finite about decisions that cut people out of my life. However, I have come to realize that Love really changes things. And its not just in the movies you find people who stay in love with people they had parted ways with.

When you meet that person your heart connects with, it becomes very difficult to separate yourself from them. You always find yourselves, no matter the difficulties you face. Why fight it then? Love never promised to be easy, and we can never find peace if we assume jumping into the next relationship would heal us somehow…. Give yourself a chance to be in love, and to stay in love. When it is for the right reasons, persistence does pay.


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